Buffy The Vampire Slayer

Willow: "Once again I’m banished to the demon section of the card catalog."

Rupert Giles wasn’t just a Watcher and a hero who saved the world on many occasions. He was a librarian, and so beloved of much of the library community that he and Buffy made the cover of American Libraries. Yes, the Sunnydale High library wasn’t much of one; it was basically Giles’ demonic reference collection and a place for the Scoobies to hang out, regroup, and plan how to eliminate the latest scourge of Sunnydale evil. But the library was my absolute favorite Buffy set. (Although I kept wanting straighten all of the books so that the call number labels were at the bottom where they belonged.)

So here are Buffy quotes relating to librarianship, and Giles being a stereotypical librarian. Let me add that librarians are not usually like the stereotype. They tend to be quite smart and well-informed, they get riled up about censorship, and their whole raison d’etre is to help people find the information they need. I haven’t seen a librarian with their hair in a bun more than once or twice in my career. And I have never seen a librarian shush anyone.

Buffy: "You’re like a textbook with arms."

Willow: "How is it you always know this stuff? You always know what’s going on. I never know what’s going on." Giles: "Well, you weren’t here from midnight until six researching it."

Giles: "I’m just going to stay and clean up a little. I’ll be back in the Middle Ages." Jenny: "Did you ever leave?"

Giles: "I’ll have you know that I have very, uh, many relaxing hobbies." Buffy: "Such as?" Giles: "Well, um... I enjoy cross-referencing." Buffy: "Do you stuff your own shirts, or do you send them out?"

Giles: "You remember the book that was stolen from the library by a vampire a few weeks ago?" Buffy: "Yeah." Giles: "It was written by Du Lac. Damn it! I let it slip my mind with all the excitement." Buffy: "I’m guessing it wasn’t a ’Taste of the Vatican’ cookbook."

Spike: "You have your way with him, you’ll never get to destroy the world. And I don’t fancy spending the next month trying to get librarian out of the carpet."

Snyder: "I love the smell of desperate librarian in the morning."

Buffy: "I mean, I can’t believe you got into Oxford." Willow: "It’s pretty exciting." Oz: "That’s some deep academia there." Buffy: "That’s where they make Gileses." Willow: "I know! I could learn and, and have scones."

Xander: "Boy, it’s a good thing no one ever wanted to check any of these books out, huh?"

Willow: "I was in the library during the quake, almost got buried under some nineteenth century literature. And I don’t have to tell you how hard it is to dig through some of that stuff."

Giles: "Xander, don’t speak Latin in front of the books."

Giles: " The resources that the Watchers Council has at their disposal... I mean the Central Library alone is just..." Buffy: "Don’t talk about the books again. You get all ... and sometimes there’s drool."

Giles: "If you think of the store as a library, it will help you to concentrate on service rather than selling." Buffy: "Yes, and then I’m going to marry Bob Dole and raise penguins in Guam."

(This one is my favorite.)

This might be a good place to thank everyone for their suggestions for future quote-related topics. No promises, though, because fall approaches.