Media musings: Fox wages war of class vs. crass

By Rob Thomas March 30, 2004

OK, seriously. What is the deal with Fox?

One of the enduring mysteries of watching television is trying to comprehend how the best shows on television and the worst shows can exist on the same network, often on the same night.

And when I say best, I’m talking unbelievably wonderful, life-changing, I-can’t-believe-this-is-on-television television, such as "The Simpsons," "X-Files," "Undeclared," "Andy Richter Controls the Universe," "Firefly," and the new "Wonderfalls."

And when I say worst, I’m talking jaw-droppingly horrible, soul-sucking, fear-for-the-future-of-our-planet television, as in "Joe Millionaire," "The Littlest Groom," "Celebrity Wrestling," "When Animals Attack" and "My Big, Fat, Obnoxious Fiance."

In my mind’s eye, I see all the network suits at Fox sitting around a giant charcoal gray conference table at a pitch meeting. Two producers sit on uncomfortable chairs before them. One stands up and says, "My idea is a charming, funny, sardonic and yet affecting series about a gift shop employee who gets advice from inanimate objects." And the suits give him the green light. (As an aside, am I the only one who actually pictures them switching on a big green light? Just wondering.)

Then the second producer stands up and says, "I wanna rip off ’The Bachelorette.’ Only some of the guys are gay." And the suits switch on the big green light again. I don’t get it. It’s like the same clothing company making both sharp, moderately expensive leather jackets and $5 "Official Bikini Inspector" T-shirts.

It’s a little ironic that every network is now desperately chasing those easy reality TV dollars that Fox unearthed years ago with "Who Wants To Marry A Multi-Millionaire," and, if you want to go back really far, shows like "COPS" and "America’s Most Wanted." Now that NBC, CBS and ABC are also pumping out their own mindless reality TV shows, you’d think Fox would seem like just another network.

But then it somehow finds a way to scrape even lower in the quality barrel than everybody else. Coming up on April 7 is "The Swan," in which average-looking contestants get radical plastic surgery and then compete in a beauty contest. Who wants to bet that Fox has a few cruel twists in mind for this show, like the losers have to go back under the knife and be transformed back into their own selves? (And if I just gave a Fox network executive a brainstorm, I’m truly, truly sorry.)

The funny thing, though, is that now that reality TV shows are squeezing quality dramas and comedies out of the lineups of every network, the Fox lineup of dramas and comedies looks awfully good compared to its competitors. While NBC pins its sitcom hopes on the drab "Whoopi!" Fox has the funny "The Bernie Mac Show." While CBS’s idea of a good family sitcom is "The Stones," Fox comes up with the subtle "Cracking Up."

And then there’s the marvelous "Wonderfalls," which airs at 8 p.m. Fridays on Fox. Even without that lousy timeslot, it could use all the help it can get. There’s almost nothing on any network that compares to this hour-long show, except for "Joan of Arcadia," but "Wonderfalls" never goes near the "Touched by an Angel" territory that the hit-and-miss "Joan" can slip into.

While "Joan" talks to God, the heroine of "Wonderfalls," a disaffected gift shop employee named Jaye, talks to souvenirs. While Joan, despite a little grumbling, genuinely wants to do good, Jaye is all grumbling. Caroline Dhavernas is hilariously caustic as Jaye, a classic twentysomething underachiever who sometimes comes off like a snack bar Dorothy Parker, and it’s her Jaye-ded worldview that gives "Wonderfalls" its kick.

Granted, Fox will probably cancel "Wonderfalls" in the next few weeks. Sorry to be such a pessimist, but it’s one of those shows that’s just too good for television. But I do think you have to give Fox credit for putting it on the air in the first place, when most networks would have just passed in favor of another reality show.

Fox has more than its share of dreadful reality shows ("Playing It Straight," the "Bachelorette-with-gay-guys" show, airs right before "Wonderfalls" on Friday), but every season you can find little outposts of quality in its schedule, if you’re willing to look.