Jewel Staite

I’m back in Vancouver now, having finally finished the Tribe. I feel like I’ve been on that movie since 2002. I am so exhausted and so spent, I don’t know how I’m going to be able to lift this martini to my lips.

It was a success, for the most part, but definitely not without it’s trials and tribulations. For the last week in Costa Rica we got rained on so badly, we were unable to finish shooting until the production hired workers to come in and fit the jungle with giant tarps to keep the rain out. It was muddy and cold and wet, and since were were doing night shoots at the end, dark and scary, too, with God-knows-what lurking at our ankles while we made the trek from our hotel rooms to the set every evening. But, shockingly enough, we survived relatively unscathed (a few scratches and very frightening bug bites, complete with larvae and the like-no, I’m not joking, and thank you, heaven, for not letting it happen to me), and then continued on to LA to finish the remainder of the movie.

I managed to jinx myself every morning by saying, "well, the worst is over, now it’s just the fun stuff!" We shot on a boat for the better part of a week, swaying and going green for twelve hours at a time, trying to get a shot with no boat traffic in the background so it actually looked like we were properly "lost and deserted". Then we moved on to the sound stage to film the sequences in the caves, complete with real rats and real boa constrictors (can you say heart attack?), and then, mercifully, it was over.

But I will say this: I had no idea I could do all that I’ve done! I’ve conquered a lot of fears and proved to myself that I’m one tough cookie when I need to be. This coming from a girl who wouldn’t ride a bike for fear of falling... major breakthroughs, here. I feel like Wonder Woman! (Joss, are you reading this?) Seriously though, I won’t lie: it was an absolute bitch, and I had no idea it was going to be as hard as it was, but I’m thinking that because we all worked so hard, it’ll pay off in the long run somehow. I cannot wait to see it all cut together, especially the final fight sequence, which took us three days to shoot.

I’m in this headspace right now where I’m contentedly letting go of the control I have over my own destiny. Sometimes I find myself stressing about the future too much, worrying about tomorrow when I’m not finished with today yet, punishing myself for something I can’t help... and lately I’ve come to realize that it’s not up to me. All I can do is do the best job I can and work really hard and be who I want to be, and the rest is up to the universe, which is strangely comforting.

I am SO happy to be home with all the little conveniences of life that I missed while I was away in Costa Rica (a big grocery store with all my favorite snacks right across the street, clean water and pinot grigio), and back with my family in my own bed. It is the most wonderful feeling to come home after being away for so long. I have a whole new appreciation for things like puppy breath and my husband’s dirty socks and cooking my own meals. Funny what you miss, huh?

I’m off to Toronto, though, next weekend, because it will be my first-ever Canadian convention called Ti-Con. I was asked at the last minute and thought, what the hell? so I’m taking my best friend and we’re going to have some fun.

After that, who knows?

love Jewel