The keywords this week were "nipples", "playboy" and "lawsuit". They didn’t happen in that order but they pertain to particular news items that sent the interweb into a frenzy. Unfortunately, there wasn’t too movement on the "lezzie" front but, like the saying goes, "not every day is a lesbian Christmas".

Clicking on Catherine Zeta-Jones’s impeccable ass will take you to some set pics of her getting cozy with Aaron Eckhart and a youngin’ on the set of the upcoming romantic comedy MOSTLY MARTHA. Jones plays the titular role of a lauded and famous chef who finds herself way over her head when her niece is left in her charge. She’s Martha, you see, and she’s mostly unprepared to handle the angst of a prepubescent teenage girl (too lame?).

Michelle Trachtenberg is starring alongside Mary Elizabeth Winstead and Katie Cassidy in a remake of the horror BLACK CHRISTMAS. In it, Trachtenberg & hottie co. play sorority sisters who are terrorized by some guy who enjoys terrorizing sorority girls. Unfortunately, Sorority Girl Terrorizer Guy decides he’s had enough of those prissy beeyotches and decides to make them sleep with the proverbial fishes one by one. Will these hotties be half-naked for the majority of the film’s runtime? That would be an affirmative, sir! Click through for a few set pics. By the way, why didn’t anyone think to have these hotties get half-nekkid in a slasher flick before? Don’t give me that "because they were jailbait" stuff either.

So here’s where the first keyword comes in. Lindsay Lohan attended the recent General Motors Ten Event show in the below-pictured ensemble and in one particular pose, her nipple proved too excited to be contained within the confines of her dress. Yeah, we’ve seen glimpses of the Lohan-nipple before and at this point getting a peek at her nip is a little anti-climactic considering she looks like that but if the nip decides it wants to say hello to the world, I am duty bound to say hello back. Or something. Look, if you haven’t seen the nip-action already, click through for a look.

One of the best things about NBC’s "My Name is Earl" (other than Jason Lee’s wicked awesome ’stache) is the lovely Ms. Nadine Velazquez. She plays the hot maid working at the hotel where Earl and his brother live. She also proves that TV is indeed warped as hotel maids that hot most certainly do NOT exist. She recently signed on to play the female lead in the Jason Statham and Jet Li-starring ROGUE so hopefully we’ll be seeing her kick some ass. Click through for the details and for some hot ass pics.

Sure, Jessica Simpson is a few cards short of a full deck (i.e. she’s an idiot) but you can bet your milky white ass that Nick Lachey is agonizing over the fact that shit like this picture below will never happen again. That’s right Nick "wants alimony from his wife because all that 98 Degrees money is slowly disappearing" Lachey, NEVER.

Reese Witherspoon is apparently getting paid a whopping thirty million duckets for her work in the upcoming horror film OUR FAMILY TROUBLE. And they said playing a ditzy blond wouldn’t lead to anything. Now what are they saying? I don’t know but what they should be saying is who the hell thought she earned a thirty million dollar payday?

And now for the remaining two keywords. I’m sure by now you’ve all seen the Playboy cover of Jessica Alba. Apparently, Alba was one of Playboy’s top sexiest celebs of 2005 so they decided to put her on the cover. They had no idea that the general public would assume she’d done a nude layout. Why would they? It’s not like Playboy cover girls have nude layouts inside the magazine. They stopped doing that about fifteen years ago. So why the hell is Alba suing Playboy? Beats me, man. But you can click through to find out what that crazy girl is thinking.

Sophia Bush recently filed for an annulment from "One Tree Hill" co-star Chad Michael Murray and cited "fraud" as the reason. Does that mean that Chad’s gay? Probably not. It means he’s an a-hole. But chances are he was one long before he got married to Bush (zing!!). Click through for the details. Or for some pics of Sophia.