Two times the pleasure, twice the fun. That’s what the networks are hoping. They’re so optimistic. Then again, I suppose when you’re marching toward oblivion, hope against hope is all you’ve got left, because the programming definitely isn’t going to save you.

You may have noticed series old and new doubling up on their regular weekly run. Veteran programs have been called up for double duty to take up the slack for freshman weaklings. Exit "The Lyon’s Den," enter back-to-back episodes of "Law & Order: Criminal Intent" last Sunday on NBC.

Bid buh-bye to "The Next Joe Millionaire’s" Tuesday run, say hello to another rerun of "24’s" premiere tonight at 8, the episode’s third airing in two weeks. Next week "That ’70s Show" steers a rerun double-decker in that slot, then shares the family hour with an 8:30 p.m. repeat of "The Simpsons" on Nov. 18.

Even a few of the newbies are shouldering twice the load only a few episodes into their on-air existence.

It’s all quite vexing, isn’t it?

And you may expect the practice to continue whether a show deserves it or not.

I mean, can we really say we didn’t like "Whoopi" from the get-go? Well, yes. OK, maybe we didn’t get the jokes. Were there any? Can’t quite recall.

NBC kindly jogged our memory by stuffing Whoopi Goldberg down our throats. After the show’s Sept. 9 premiere, NBC repeated the first episode on Sept. 11. Had you missed it that time, you could have caught it and "Happy Family" again on KING/5 Sept. 20. Once it was clear that Mavis Rae’s face-off with a Dubya impersonator on Oct. 14 did more for the ratings than "Coupling" — out went the flaccid sextet, in went a repeat of the Bush-whacking the following Thursday.

This is politely referring to as "sampling." You know, like those women in the grocery store who sweetly offer you free bites of pizza. Then, when you refuse, they tackle you, pin you by the back of your neck and scream, "Eat it! EAT IT!"

By popping us with double barrels of "Whoopi" until we couldn’t miss it, NBC increased each show’s ratings. "Whoopi" and "Happy Family" have been picked up for a full season, evidence that the old one-two can work.

Which begs the question, why launch a two-fisted assault with some new series and not others? Why give the critically reviled "Whoopi" (and, on some nights, the more deserving "Happy Family") an extra shove, and not the equally hated "Coupling"?

Compare the casts. "Happy Family" has recognizable stars in John Larroquette and Christine Baranski, and obviously so does "Whoopi." The impotent "Coupling" was composed of a cast of unknowns who didn’t merit any favors from NBC.

"Whoopi" lives. "Coupling" is dead. There’s your silver lining.

Then again, as Fox is finding out with "Skin," twice isn’t always nice. Fox’s new 9 p.m. Monday drama (airing on KCPQ/13) was promoted heavily during the baseball playoffs to an audience that couldn’t care less. It premiered in the ratings slough. Having the schedule’s worst lead-in ("Joe Millionaire") hasn’t helped things much.

Nevertheless, Fox is doggedly reairing it Thursdays at 9 p.m., where it basks in more failure than in its regular time slot. When the network no longer can deny the drama’s giving its lineup a big wrinkle, "Skin" will go the way of all flesh.

If Fox has any sense, it’ll double punch "Arrested Development" on the schedule to prevent it from an undeserving demise in the cursed slot following "Malcolm."

On the other hand, a few repeats of ABC’s Thursday night drama "Threat Matrix" on Mondays before football didn’t increase its fortunes much, and it still received a full-season pickup. Why? Because regardless of how low the ratings are, "Threat Matrix" (airing here on KOMO/4) still fares better against CBS’s "Survivor" and NBC’s "Friends" than Fox’s "Tru Calling," a dud that bowed to as many viewers as wrestling attracts to UPN. Third place was ABC’s goal, and it got it.

Also keep in mind that "Threat Matrix" dreams up its post-9/11 fictional crises with the help of consultants formerly of the National Security Agency, the FBI and the CIA, as well as aid from the Department of Defense and even a few congressmen for the sake of accuracy. The ratings probably matter less if you have a show that warms the cockles of the Bush administration’s heart.

Maybe that’s just me, but how else do you explain that "Threat Matrix," tied with "Skin" at No. 82 on the Nielsen weekly ratings chart for the week of Oct. 20, received a full-season pickup, whereas "Karen Sisco," a bit higher at 76, has not?

Perhaps "Karen" will fare better if ABC gives her twice the love for a couple of weeks. C’mon, ABC, give it a try. In the right spot, we bet viewers will happily bite.