Sarah Michelle Gellar

SOUTHLAND TALES

The version I saw had a total runtime of 2 hours 18 minutes. This is reportedly the final length that will be released in theatres, the only difference this cut still had certain FX shots missing – some buildings remained in pre-viz stage, whilst there were a few subtitles instead of actual dialogue that had yet to be recorded.

Before the review I would like to stipulate a few things:

I am a big Donnie Darko fan. On the strength of that film I had been looking forward to Southland Tales for a long time and was completely surprised by the initial reviews of the 160-minute Cannes Cut.

I have not seen that cut of the film, so this viewing was my first reaction to ST.

I enjoy films that lead me places that do not always make perfect sense – but I believe a film has to earn that right. Inland Empire is my joint favourite film (with Zodiac) of 2007 thus far.

I felt cheated by this film.

The premise is interesting, but after sitting through the duration I feel most people will be left unmoved by anything on screen with only thoughts of disappointment, and most likely confusion.

The overriding problem with ST is that it never really takes off or develops into much of anything. We meet characters; they say something ‘whacky’ or act in a heavy-handed futuristic way that is supposed to provide social commentary; then we move on. Repeat this process each time we see them.

Southland Tales opens with home-video footage of a Texan July 4th party in 2005 where a nuclear bomb goes off. Cut to credit sequence (unfinished in this cut) where a Justin Timberlake voiceover informs the viewer that in the three years that have passed, WWIII has begun and America’s homeland security has tightened to such an extent that visas are required to travel between states. A group of liberal ‘neo-Marxists’ have formed to rebel against ‘USIdent’ – a company created by the republicans as an ultra big-brother-style monitor of the public and the entire internet. Furthermore there is a new kind of energy in the world known as ‘liquid karma’ which uses tidal force to wirelessly power military vehicles allowing them to never need refuelling… and... yet more… only the votes from California will count in the 2008 governmental election. JT’s voiceover continues throughout the film, providing the sparsest of characterisation to our 2D characters and also quoting various biblical verses that are intermittently relevant to the action.

Post credits, the film begins and we learn that Boxer Santaros (The Rock) is a famous actor with a heavy political swing for the republicans. He went missing for 3 days and ended up in Nevada (which baffles the powers because of the visa situation) and now he has ended up back in southland California (further baffling the government). Boxer has written a screenplay called ‘The Power’ with his porn star mistress Krysta Now (Sarah Michelle Gellar) which prophesizes how the world will end.

Next we are introduced to one of the Taverner ‘twins’ both of whom are played by Seann William Scott. It is a pretty cool scene in which he is weirding himself out in front of a bathroom mirror and playing around with a gun – all the while his reflection is about 3 seconds behind him. Upon leaving the bathroom we see his twin lying unconscious on the floor and some neo-Marxists tell Taverner that he needs to impersonate his brother and pretend to be racist cop.

Various other characters show up, but the main thrust is that Boxer wants to film himself doing ride-alongs with Taverner as research for a new film role. Knowing this, the neo-Marxists have set it up for him to witness a fake domestic double murder, which they will then use to bribe the Republicans. The set-up goes wrong and Boxer and Taverner witness a real murder.

This sequence frustrated me greatly because it should have been so much more. Their escape is filmed using slow-motion steadicam shots whilst Pixies classic ‘Wave of Mutilation’ resonates over the soundtrack. Although visually interesting, the (deliberately?) minimalistic character development leaves the scene feeling flat and tacky instead of the visceral rush that Kelly was no doubt striving for.

This happens yet again during the climax of the film, where another prolonged musical montages kicks in – something which a contemporary director such as PT Anderson can pull of with such vigour - yet here I simply felt nothing. This cinematic device, which also worked so well in Darko, should provide a moment where audience and character unite; a song reflecting an eclectic group’s feeling. Unfortunately here the lack of any genuine emotional resonance or dramatic suspense ruined the third act’s catharsis.

One gets the distinct impression that after the success of Donnie Darko, Kelly tried to do something far too abstract. The result is a collection of interesting concepts and segments that in no way fit together as a narrative or even an enjoyable experience. Whilst the idea of Justin Timberlake miming The Killers ‘All These Things That I Have Done’ as girls dance around him and he pours Bud over his head sounds fantastic on paper, it has no correlation to anything at 90 minutes through the film and completely fails to pay off. Things like this happen throughout – cars hump each other as part of a commercial; a character of little significance begs The Rock to allow her to felate him in the middle of Venice Beach. If I had read this and knew Kelly was directing I would have looked forward to some funny, peculiar scenes to enjoy discussing afterwards with my friends. Scenes such as ‘Sparkle Motion’ from Darko work. Here they feel out of place and do not.

I respect Kelly’s ambition with the film, but at times it feels like a 140-minute student film and whereas Darko was genuinely funny this frequently feels like a Carry On movie with some added sci-fi elements eerily reminiscent of Galaxy Quest (just sadly without any tongue in cheek).

A few positives:

It is well fairly shot and as always I enjoyed the work of the principals here, in particular Seann William Scott and Justin Timberlake.

The repetition of the line “he is a pimp and pimp’s don’t commit suicide” is pretty cool. As is the very last scene.

Moby’s score worked well and there is an excellent selection of songs throughout including Blur’s ‘Tender’ as the end credits roll.

At present I struggle to see how Southland could even become a cult favourite. I will go see this at the cinema to see it with the FX shots completely rendered, and shall remain slightly hopeful that on a repeat viewing something grows on me. But for the most part I strongly believe that it’s not that I did not ‘get’ the film – there simply is not much of anything to grasp on to, let alone ponder and discuss. Obviously the Darko fanbase will pay to watch the film, but like me I feel they will only be disappointed. It saddens me to say that even after all this time in the editing room, Southland Tales remains a distinctly underwhelming mess.