Here are some pairs you may recognize, and an area where their model — or a lack of mutually creating or enacting one — was problematic.

Romeo and Juliet: Both had family conflicts they clearly needed to work out first before getting so invested. Unfortunately, you can’t really do that once you’re dead.

Sam and Frodo (The Lord of the Rings): Had a strained relationship due to Frodo’s addiction and dependency issues with the ring, which needed to be addressed first and given more priority than the relationship.

Anya and Xander (Buffy, the Vampire Slayer): Xander had an end goal of marriage in the moment, and asked Anya to marry him, who shared that end goal. As his feelings changed, and he discovered he wasn’t ready for that after all, he didn’t communicate with her in revamping their relationship model. Instead, he left her at the altar, resulting in her not only having her heart broken, but in going back to being a vengeance demon.

Homer and Marge Simpson: Marge and Homer agreed to share responsibilities and commitments in their marriage agreement, which Homer continually does not honor, yet neither of them are proactive in earnestly addressing this imbalance, discussing an alternate model which might be more successful. Some of their children appear to be more observant of the poor model than they are. Lisa will probably walk into her relationships feeling far more proactive about preventing grunt work imbalances.

Kermit and Miss Piggy: Kermit passively agreed to a model Piggy wanted — a big time commitment and monogamy — without considering or discussing his own wants and needs, or the double-standards she held him to (to say nothing of her physical abusiveness: that should have been a dealbreaker for Kermie from minute one).

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